My Name is Kate

Increasing our capacity for compassion

What happened in Boston is terrible. No question. As is every other act of terror that happens every day around the globe - when an individual or small group is so filled with hatred for those different than themselves that they feel the only way to react is violence.

On a much smaller (and less violent) scale, we all deal with this every day ourselves. I struggle with this. I dismiss opinions from people I disagree with - from people who don't see MY view. I've unfollowed people on Twitter because of a Tweet that espoused a different take on a situation than mine. I've reacted to the Other with suspicion and disrespect and disregard.

I don't particularly like this about myself so I have been actively trying to become a more compassionate person. I was inspired by the winner of the 2008 TED Prize, Karen Armstrong. Armstrong's wish for her TED Prize was to launch the Charter for Compassion.

The Charter for Compassion is a document that transcends religious, ideological, and national differences. Supported by leading thinkers from many traditions, the Charter activates the Golden Rule around the world. The Charter for Compassion is a cooperative effort to restore not only compassionate thinking but, more importantly, compassionate action to the center of religious, moral and political life. Compassion is the principled determination to put ourselves in the shoes of the other, and lies at the heart of all religious and ethical systems.

To cultivate an informed empathy with the suffering of all human beings, even those regarded as enemies. To make compassion a clear, luminous and dynamic force in our polarized world.

So, how do we become more compassionate?

I was given the advice once, in regards to management and innovation, that each month I should read a magazine that had nothing to do with my field of practice or interest. To pick up something like "Field Technicians Monthly" or "Sewage Treatment Quarterly". Because first and foremost they were about passion - and by reading about someone else's passion for their career might inspire some in my own. And also because great ideas about management and innovation can come from anywhere. To keep a sharp mind and open creative spirit, it is imperative to have a regular stream of new ideas and experiences available.

In my attempts to cultivate compassion, I've tried a similar tact. I need to have a regular inputs from people who are not like me. Now, I don't go out and read vitriolic blog posts or watch hate videos against my default position - because I don't think that is particularly constructive. I'm not trying to find new arguments .. I'm trying to find compassion. And frankly compassion is hard to find in the YouTube comment section. So, instead, I regularly read a blog about hijab fashion, beauty and entertainment for Muslim women: hijabtrendz

Ria Miranda’s collection from Indonesia Fashion Week 2013

Started by Miriam Sobh, a broadcast journalist in Chicago, hijabtrendz covers hijab fashion trends (particularly international fashion) as well as reviews of makeup and beauty products. There are occasional eating and exercise tips. Plus, hijabtrendz has interviews with Muslim fashion designers and Muslim women in the entertainment industry. And occasionally she writes a thought-provoking piece like about the struggles of being a blogger and how to handle product reviews or calling attention to the bullying of Muslim women by other Muslim women.

I realise that this is a very small and simple thing that I do. But it reminds me on a regular basis that there are some many wonderful, amazing, delightful people in the world, Miriam Sobh, among them who have a different perspective and cultural experience on this world than I do. My experience is not the dominant one in the world. But it also serves to expand my attention span. There was an article in Wired recently about designer Adam Harvey who is working on a line of counter-surveillance fashion, called Stealth Wear, including, among other items, a hijab scarf that is designed to block thermal-imaging used by drones.

Which causes me to think, like the bullet-proof backpacks for kids that became popular after the Sandy Hook school shooting in Newtown did, what are we doing as a global society where we have to create fashion lines and accessories that can protect us from random harm? That we feel we must anticipate violence.

I'm in my mid-40's - a long way from an idealistic college student. But on good days I think we can still change the world. But I know that change will come from the bottom up. From one person seeing another as a person and having empathy for them. Not seeing them as a faceless race or culture or religion or lifestyle, but to honour the inviolable sanctity of every single human being, treating everybody, without exception, with absolute justice, equity and respect.

That is hard to do. It's counter to what media tells us, what politicians tell us, what some of our most entrenched institutions tell us. But to me, it's an essential project. Because just as compassion can expand our world, fear and anger can constrict it. And I want to live in a wonderfully diverse, expanding world.

~

As I was writing this, I came across a couple of other really interesting links that I wanted to share:

• Maggie Koerth-Baker (lady scientist extraordinaire and BoingBoing science editor and author of Before the Lights Go Out, a book about electricity, infrastructure, and the future of energy) live blogged a talk at SUNY-Oswega by M. Neelika Jayawardane, an associate professor of English there. Jayawardane's lecture was on "If you see something, say something" and other campaigns aimed at getting average people involved in public security. Some really interesting ideas about what images and representations that we become used to seeing as The Other.
• Rolf Dobelli, author of The Art of Thinking Clearly: Better Thinking, Better Decisions, published an article in The Guardian today about why news is bad for you. "News is bad for your health. It leads to fear and aggression, and hinders your creativity and ability to think deeply. The solution? Stop consuming it altogether." Dobelli speaks (more eloquently and more thoroughly) to a couple of things I mention in my last paragraph above.

Today, let's talk about early Twentieth Century Flower Delivering Robots from Wrylon Robotical

Today I thought we could talk about robots. Robots were certainly a theme at TED. We saw the famous Baxter who has been designed to work with humans in physical labour locations (aka factories). And the cool new personal robot, the Romotive, was also demoed (I so want one of these!).

But I wanted to talk about some old-fashioned robots. Old-fashioned robots who used to deliver flowers. Botanical Delivery Bots from Wrylon Robotical - a company started by Rhoderick R. Wrylon, that created and dominated the flower delivering robot market. He opened the doors of the first Wrylon Robotical delivery storefront in 1906 and the company thrived until 1913, when it mysteriously shuttered its doors.

I recently acquired the Illustrated Catalog of these robots and it is incredible. Barry McWilliams (Twitter) is the talented illustrator behind the Wrylon Catalog. The little book is truly a marvel. Aside from the actual catalog full of illustrations and ads, McWilliams also included some delightful ephemera .. delivery orders, a letter that mentions rumours of robots gone missing, a newspaper article about the closing of the factory. I really hope this all points to a larger project that McWilliams has in mind, because what a fun adventure that would be!!

Now, the Illustrated Catalog was available through a Kickstarter project. (Side note .. I'm a little obsessed with Kickstarter. But more on that in a later post.) And is not currently available. Sad face. BUT! McWilliams has started a second Wrylon-related project on Kickstarter and there are still 7 days (ends March 13) to get in on that project. It's a collection of Wrylon Robotical Field Guides … designed for engineers and "Bot Spotters". Three of them will be filled with sketches, tips for spotting, etc. The fourth (a stretch goal) is a blank grid-ruled notebook for our own sketches, but still in the Wrylon Field Guide style.

I've signed up for this Kickstarter too (don't tell Rosemary). And if you are as charmed by these robots as I am, I'd encourage you to sign up as well. You get a 3-pack (plus the blank notebook) for only $15 (that includes shipping outside the US; in the US it's only $12). This project has already been funded, so it will go ahead. But I really want McWilliams to receive as much support as possible because I love these little bots and I want to know more about their adventures and why the heck the factory shut down. This is the kind of storytelling and creativity that we need more of (not Cougar Town and Fifty Shades of Grey (IMNSHO)). So, check out the video below and then hop on over to the Kickstarter and pledge your $15 to the project. I know you won't regret it!

Photo Credits:
Robot images from Barry McWilliams' site
Photos of catalog from my Flickr

My TED 2013 Wrapup - The Good, The Great and the Enraging

Well, this week was the 2013 TED Conference. I've been attending TED either in-person or virtually since 2005. This year we streamed it (as TEDLive members). And even though we're attending "virtually", we do set aside the week to attend all the sessions. Overall, this year was better than the last couple. In the past, I've found a higher ratio of either poorly prepared presenters (C'mon, you're presenting at TED! This is not the time for your famous "off the cuff" lecture style) or presenters who sell from the stage (not always overt, but there have been a few who are all "well in my book, I say". Blerg.)

Ted 2013 Opening Video from mac premo on Vimeo.

To me, there was only one truly awful one (not mentioned below). And one where I was prepared to LOVE the content but the presenter took us down a wendy windy wandering academic garden path that made no sense and a lot of their points got lost along the way. And there were a couple of "audience talks" that were pretty cringe-worthy.

However, there were truly some outstanding presentations - for various reasons. Most of them good.

These are my TED 2013 presentation highlights. In all cases I've linked to the official TED Blog post about them where if they haven't posted the video yet, hopefully they will. The blog posts also have all the links to the presenters' bios, websites, etc.:

Most informative on a new-to-me topic
Saki Mafundikwa founded the Zimbabwe Institute of Vigital Arts, ZIVA, a Bauhaus-style school focused on African heritage. Mafundikwa's talk was about the story of writing in Africa - likely where the written form began rather than in Mesopotamia. The true message of his talk was that African designers have a lot of inspiration in their own heritage and history - and they shouldn't look to the outside for inspiration, but from within their own culture. Mafundikwa showed a few slides both of historical African design as well as work from the students at ZIVA. It was incredible - I've ordered his book about Afrikan Alphabets to learn more.

Photo: James Duncan Davidson

Most inspired me to take local action
Since we bought a place with a yard, we've been gardening. Now, we don't have enough acreage to grow ALL our own food, but I find that our small plots are good practice from a food security point of view, to prepare for the day when the oil runs out and if we don't grow our own we don't eat. Hopefully that day is still a few years away, but I think it is important to continue honing my gardening skills. So does Ron Finley. He's a guerilla gardener in South Central LA who wants everyone to garden - even more than Michelle Obama does. He wants his community to own their health and own their food supply. Finley is a fantastic storyteller. He preaches and adds a little humour: "Gardening is the most therapeutic and defiant act you can do, especially in the inner city. Plus, you get strawberries." He holds "dig ins" to teach people in his community how to garden. He is inspiring and has gotten me excited about another growing season and the real potential for creating change in a local community.

Update March 6: Ron's Talk has been posted!

Photos: James Duncan Davidson

 

Made my Canadian heart glow the warmest
Canadians had some pretty good representation at TED this year, folks from Vancouver, in particular (does that have anything to do with the fact that TED is coming to Vancouver for 2 years?). My favourite Canadian moment was when Shane Koyczan took the stage. You likely remember Shane from his phenomenal spoken-word performance at the Vancouver 2010 Games. Shane has continued his wonderful lyrical work since 2010 and closed the Thursday night session of TED with his wonderful storytelling … a powerful intro and then the recitation of his latest work "To This Day". They haven't posted the video of Shane at TED yet, but you can hear his words set to the combined animations of 80 illustrators. 

Photo: James Duncan Davidson

Most enraging
WARNING: There is swearing in the following. And I know it sounds like I'm a crusty old man screaming "You kids get off my lawn." Whatever. Skip to the next one if you don't want to read that :)

Every year there is at least one TED presentation that makes me furious - not because it was poorly presented but because to me the topic is so incredibly self-evident that I can't believe TED wasted 18 minutes on it. This year, Meg Jay earned my wrath. Her talk was about how we need to make sure that we tell people in their 20's that they need to start behaving like they are adults. That "30 is not the new 20" and they can't blow off their 20's, fuck around at pointless jobs, and be in bad relationships because they are just fucking around waiting for their real life to start at 30.

And she wrote a book about it.

Are you shitting me? I already find millennials infuriating because HR people spend so much time telling us that they have special needs in the workplace and need to be treated differently. They need challenges and autonomy. Now the ones who aren't demanding special treatment in the workplace still need to be coddled?

Bullshit. Millennials, 20-somethings, whatever need a swift kick in the pants. I graduated from university when I was 21 (because I applied myself and finished a term early) smack dab in the middle of a recession. There were no jobs. I didn't move home with my parents and work part time in a Payless Shoe Store (Starbucks didn't exist at the time). I marched down to Kelly Services and became a Kelly Girl until I found the right position that would advance my career - it took me a while, but I did it. And nobody had to tell me not to waste time - I figured it out. Because I wanted to eat and pay rent. Also in my twenties, I was in two relationships, but they weren't goofing around relationships - I thought they were the real thing. Turns out, they weren't. But if I hadn't had them, I couldn't be in the awesome relationship I have now.

I can't believe that people in their twenties need to be told the things Dr. Jay says we need to make sure we tell them. These people are TWENTY not TWELVE. Sure .. let's support them, mentor them - but to tell them "hey, don't waste your twenties" … well no fucking kidding. Ugh.

Photo: TED Blog

 

Neat idea I want to incorporate into one of my own passions

Lisa Bu is a staffer at TED - apparently they occasionally give their own TED talks within the office - and she was invited to share her talk with the larger TED audience. Bu talked about how her love of reading helped her get past her unrealised dream of becoming an opera singer. What I love, though (aside from Bu's charm and genuineness) is how she reads comparatively. She'll read the same book in two different languages at the same time - to try to understand the nuances of each. Or two banned books. Or other interesting pairings. It's a great idea for people trying to inject an additional level of meaning into their reading habit.

 

Photo: TED blog

 

Best talk given by a geek girl
What if you were reading the newspaper - the dead-tree kind of newspaper - and you wanted to share an article from it. So you touched the "Like" button that was at the top of the article and that posted it to your Facebook page. Yes, the "Like" button was on the paper edition of the newspaper and pressing it triggers a digital event. That's what charming uber geek Kate Stone is working on - interactive paper. She's designed menus where you can order by touching them and has created a paper (paper!) DJ mixing board that connects to an iPad app where she can mix music. This is some seriously cool Harry Potteresque stuff!!

Bonus: Kate also shared her three most important life skills in a separate talk.

Photo: TED Blog

Thing I'm not really sure is a great idea
Ever since I read the first Thursday Next novel from Jaspar Fforde, I have wanted a pet dodo. This year at TED, Stewart Brand (of Whole Earth Catalog fame) gave a talk on "de-extinction" - the possibility (reality!) of bringing back extinct species. Now, as much as I would LOVE a pet dodo, I don't know that this is a great idea. Not because of some Jurassic Parkesque fear, but I worry that we, as the dominant species on the planet, will trivialise the impact we have on the environment. WE HAVE WIPED OUT SPECIES BECAUSE OF OUR GREED. Now, if we can bring them back, will we ever feel the immorality of what we have done in the first place? There's going to be a whole TEDxDeExtinction event on March 15 - and they are live-streaming it for free. I'm planning on watching. 

Photo: James Duncan Davidson

My TED Book list
Most of the folks who spoke at TED also wrote a book, or two. I've added a TED 2013 shelf over on my Goodreads with the ones I'm planning on reading. The TED blog actually had a more complete list a month or so ago - books to read to get you ready for TED.

Rosemary's wrapup
One of the reasons that I prefer livestreaming TED rather than attending (aside from the overall cost savings) is that I can share TED with Rosemary as well as a few close friends. Rosemary's done her roundup of this year's TED - a different take than mine - she highlights some great talks as well!

 

And that's it! A few of the talks from this year have been posted and more will continue to go up. So if you haven't subscribed to TED's weekly newsletter, make sure you do so! One of my goals this year is to watch a new TED talk once a week - we'll see if that happens now that I've had a full four days of TED.

February Makes Me Wish for a Trip to the Spa - This Month's Addition to my Shoebox

So, it's now late February - I figured it was time to update my Shoebox for the month (if you're just joining us, this is the original post).

I was hoping to find some winter outer gear (hat, gloves, scarf, etc) on sale, but didn't locate anything. So, I went with a "spa" idea instead (who doesn't dream about going to the spa in dreary February - or maybe I'm projecting?). So - a nice mani-pedi kit in a re-sealable sleeve with nail brush, foot file, emery board, etc. On sale for $5.99.

I also received a bonus item this month - my friend, Elisa, received one of those cool, fold-away reusable totes from LUG in a conference swag bag. She has others, so she gave this one to me. Since it is unused and even still has the tags on, I'm adding it to my box. These fold-away totes are so handy - Rosemary and I each carry one (a different brand) in our purse or backpack - nice to have when you stop by a store or shop unexpectedly and don't want to carry home a couple of pounds of salmon in your hands :)

Remember, I'm tracking each month's shoebox item and cost. If you're following along and building a box, send me a pic and/or your ideas!

Remembering to Spend Out - Finding My Way in a Cluttered World

I have hoarder tendencies. If there were a Kinsey Scale of clutter (from zen minimalist to star of A&E's Extreme Hoarders), I would be just right of centre. Not quite all the way to crazy cat lady, but certainly someone who has to work to keep her table top clean and whose bookshelf could use a good thinning.

I like to collect things. Not ALL things, but specific categories of things. Because the end game to the collecting is sorting. (So, I actually like to SORT things.) And to sort, you have to have things .. hence the collecting. I blame Herman Hesse for my collecting. Hesse wrote The Glass Bead Game which I read as a young person. Well, tried to read - I checked it out of the library and got a few dozen pages into it. It was largely beyond my ability at the time and I missed most of the point of the book, but it didn't stop me from fantasizing about what the titular game would look and play like … a synthesis of human learning along different themes, drawing from examples of art, music, literature, philosophical thought, science theories, etc.

All represented by beads.

I imagined a complex, multi-dimensional abacus of filaments and beads. I even convinced my father to help me build such a device. It ended up being much less complex than my imagination (more like a multi-string, 2 dimensional abacus rather than a multi-dimensional one), but still a device that I delighted in stringing and restringing with various patterns of beads. I wish I had pictures of this device and its various incarnations. But, alas, I grew up in a time when we didn't document every waking moment. But my bead collection was prodigious.

Though the years, these hoarder inclinations have taken various forms. The worst was when I filled up a basement with old computer parts I was going to turn into art. Absolute nightmare. Currently, I have way too many envelopes of chiyogami paper. I find some of these papers so beautiful, it almost makes me ache to look at them. I've been actively trying to resist hoarding these papers, trying to find projects in which to use them. I used a few on the Christmas cards I made this year.

When I get in this hoarding mode, I remind myself of something I read in Gretchen Rubin's The Happiness Project. In her chapter on money and its relation to happiness, Rubin discusses about the idea of "spending out" …

A few years ago, my sister gave me a box of beautiful stationery for my birthday. I loved it, but I'd never used it. When I was mailing some photos to the grandparents, I hesitated to use the new stationery because I was "saving" it; but to what better use could it be put? Of course I should use those notes. Spend out.

Rubin further expands "spending out" to our generosity with time and ideas. And in all things "trusting abundance". (This whole chapter on happiness and money is excellent - I really love the entire book, but she really crystallizes some ideas for me around money and material things). I try to remember to spend out .. with my chiyogami paper and other ways … by remembering to use the good china, drink the good wine, eat the gourmet chocolate, write with the good pen. Rubin quotes one of her blog readers who commented on a post about spending out "Life is too short to save your good china or your good lingerie or your good ANYTHING for later because truly, later may never come."

I've been thinking even more about spending out because I am reading Life at Home in the Twenty-First Century: 32 Families Open Their Doors - a fascinating book that documents the key findings of a social science research project by researchers at the Center on Everyday Lives of Families (CELF): tracking the daily lives (through interviews, photographs, videos, and other ethnographic methods) of 32 families in Southern California. All of the families in this book have a clutter problem .. in varying degrees. But it seems 95% of North Americans have a clutter problem. Too much stuff. We see this in the rise of personal organizers and decluttering experts (my personal favourite, Peter Walsh from the old TLC Clean Sweep show - he's still helping people get organized - he did a FANTASTIC declutter project called #31days2getorganized on social media in January). And in the abundance of aspirational magazines like Real Simple.

Below is an episode about clutter in Americans' lives, made by the researchers from the CELF project. An observation made by one of the researchers, Anthony P. Graesch - Assistant Professor of Anthropology at Connecticut College and an ethnoarchaeologist …

We have many mechanisms by which we accumulate possessions in our home, but we have few rituals or mechanisms or processes for unloading these objects, for getting rid of them.

As a former ritual theory major, I find this comment quite telling (it's at about 3:20 in the video - the whole 6:30 are fascinating and worth watching - actually ALL the videos in this series (3) are worth watching). One of the participants in the study appears in the video right after Graesch and describes how things come in: birthdays, holidays, relatives, school and found "treasures". But Graesch's point is well made .. we don't have well-defined occasions or processes for letting go and getting rid of things. On Clean Sweep, fully half (if not more) of Walsh's time was spent as therapist - helping people understand that objects were not the same as people - and as priest - giving people ritual (sometimes a brutal process and sometimes a game) that helped people sort and purge. The #31days2getorganized challenge I mentioned above is a further testament to his ability as ritual tender.

Another welcome entry into this area is the new holiday of Discardia - created by Dinah Sanders 10 years ago as a reminder to let go of what (stuff, habits, ideas) wasn't making her life awesome. Sanders also wrote Discardia: More Life, Less Stuff which contains three key principles and numerous practical tips to celebrate this new holiday and address specific issues, carve away the nonsense of physical objects, habits, or emotional baggage, and uncover what brings you joy. Discardia happens four times a year; Sanders keeps celebrants on track via Facebook and Twitter. Sanders' ebook version of Discardia is only $2.99 - totally worth it!

Aside from my spending out struggles, I do try to find my own ways to declutter. Both Rosemary and I try to do a bi-annual (winter and summer) clothes review. We've held two book swaps over the last year and plan to do another one in the spring (maybe not 100% oriented towards clutter reduction, but at least clutter rotation :). And I'm hoping to create a Little Free Library this spring as well which may help a bit more with book sharing as well.

And, of course, finding ways to use my chiyogami scraps.

Photo Credits: JimmyMac210 and Fortinbras

Following up on the Shoebox Project

Back in November I posted about The Shoebox Project for Shelters - a cross-Canada initiative to assemble and distribute shoeboxes that contain small luxuries to gift to women in shelters over the holidays. I was so pleased to be part of the Vancouver team. We collected and distributed 261 boxes to the Vancouver Rape Relief Centre, Ray Cam Community Centre and the Downtown Eastside Women's Centre in Vancouver, part of the 2700 that were collected and distributed across the country.

It was a truly inspiring project to be a part of. Aside from being able to brighten the holiday season for 261 women, I also got to meet some generous, kind-hearted people. Some of the folks who delivered boxes to our door:

• A super-charming older gentleman who came to the door and handed us a roll of wrapping paper and a shoebox in a shopping bag. Seeing that we were puzzled by the lightness of the shoebox, he rummaged around in the shopping bag and pulled out a crisp $50 bill that was safely stored in a sandwich bag. "I want to help, but I don't know what to buy for ladies."
• Two women from a five-person dentist office who delivered a pair of boxes plus a bag of extras. They decided to forgo their office's Secret Santa and instead create shoeboxes.
• A woman who delivered 20 boxes in her SUV. She, her four daughters and their husbands/boyfriends had made this a weekend project.
• A young man who seemed like he just finished his shift on a traffic construction site (he was wearing a lot of safety and reflective gear). He pulled the equivalent of the contents of a full shoebox from various pockets in his coat and vest. It was pretty spectacular.
• A very shy young woman accompanied by her brother (or possibly boyfriend?). He stood and waited on the sidewalk while she rang the bell. She didn't say anything .. but handed over a beautifully wrapped shoebox. She ducked her head and smiled when I said thank you - and looked back to the young man on the street. He gave her a big smile and two thumbs up. She smiled again, turned back to me, waved and hurried back to the fellow on the street.
• A woman and crazy-busy tech executive who wasn't able to drop off the boxes herself, but sent a courier with a couple of boxes and some extras at the end of the day on the last day we were collecting (this is a woman after my own heart).

These are just the few that stuck out. Everyone who dropped off a box was excited about the project and happy to be participating. Most people found out about us through the article that appeared in Vancouver 24 hours. So thank you, Cam!!

And thank you to my friends and colleagues who supported this project. Whether you assembled and gifted a box or spent an afternoon with us assembling and wrapping boxes (a lot of folks brought the contents sans shoebox), I appreciate all of you!! And a HUGE thank you to my wife, Rosemary. She went through every single box that we collected (over 100 at our location) and checked each item. She sorted and discarded items like used makeup brushes, 1/2 empty bottles of lotion and expired Cups of Soup (a few people used this as a "clean out under my bathroom sink opportunity"). But thanks to her, no woman in a shelter received a bag of partially used, schmutz-coated hotel shampoo samples.

Assembling a Shoebox for 2013
One of the comments that both I and another of the drop-off locations heard was that there is already a lot of time and money pressure on people during the holidays - so would it be possible to do this at a different time of year? I think this is a great point and here is my idea: let's build a shoebox over the course of the year. That way, the $50 outlay isn't all at once and hopefully you can incorporate purchasing that month's item into your regular shopping.

So, I'm going to do that. Over 2013, I'll assemble a shoebox .. taking into account that there are some things we don't want to buy too early (makeup, chocolate) because of potential expiry. I've started a summary page that includes what is going into my box as well as some alternative ideas for that month. Then each month, I'll post the new item that's going into my shoebox and link it on the summary page. Sound good?

Shoebox Item for January
Well, the first thing on the list was "get a shoebox" :) Trickier than you might think. But, now done. This month, the theme is dental care (start off the new year right - plus, toothpaste generally has a 2 year shelf life - the expiry date on this one is end of 2014). In the box this month: toothpaste, toothbrush and floss. Regular price would have been $13.50, but all these were on sale and came to only $6.00.

The Shoebox Project has launched in Vancouver! Help brighten the holidays for a woman in a Vancouver shelter.

I am living a blessed life. I am warm and cozy at night in a place I can call my own. I have an amazing wife and extended family. I do not experience the fear or reality of domestic violence. And I have a job that pays well and lets me afford little luxuries.

This was not always the case. I remember a time when I was thrilled to find an extra dime at the bottom of my purse which meant that I could afford bus fare. Or when I found $5 in a puddle next to the curb which meant that I could buy the jar of peanut butter I'd been craving. It was a time of survival, not one of luxury. And it was a mean existence. But I was lucky - I had friends and colleagues who made that time seem less dark and helped me through.

It's important that we have hope in our lives. And to know that someone, even a stranger, cares. Which is why I am so pleased to be a part of The Shoebox Project for Shelters' Vancouver launch (official letter).

The Shoebox Project for Shelters is a non-for-profit initiative that collects small gifts that are packaged in shoeboxes, and distributes them to women in shelters just before the holidays. These shelters provide emergency and transitional shelter and services to women who are homeless because they flee abuse or difficult living situations, they are poor or afflicted with mental illness or they are new Canadians who require assistance.

These shoeboxes brighten the holiday season and let the women know they are special and not forgotten. They are filled with items that a woman would enjoy but would not splurge on for herself in times of difficulty.

This is the second official year of The Shoebox Project in Montreal and Toronto. This year, it is launching in Halifax, London and Vancouver. In Vancouver, we are collecting shoeboxes for the Vancouver Rape Relief Centre and the Downtown Eastside Women's Centre.

OK, here's my ask …

The holidays are approaching and they bring with them a lot of pressures. Including the pressure to give to charitable organizations. I know that it's a tough economic time for people and budgets are tight. But please read this comment from the Program Supervisor at Street Haven Shelter in Toronto …

The women loved the boxes and all of the items in them, a few of the women were ecstatic as they had never received or owned a bottle of perfume, they loved the make-up, chocolates and body care products.  For a few of the women it was the first time they were celebrating the holidays and they were so emotional about how wonderful everything was and how grateful they are to organizations like yours.

Ladies ... imagine never having received a bottle of perfume. Or always having to choose peanut butter or other staples over hand lotion or lip balm. Or a little box of Lindor chocolates.

I would like to invite you … either alone or as part of a group (maybe your book club or your play date group or your yoga class - or even an activity with your kids) … to make a shoebox (or heck, more than one shoebox!). Our goal is 100 shoeboxes in Vancouver. I would like to think that my network alone could create those 100 shoeboxes. Is that expecting too much?

What should go in the box (approximately $50 in value):

• Body or hand lotions
• Makeup: mascara, lipstick and nail polish. (Please no concealers or foundations)
• Toothbrush, toothpaste and floss
• Chocolates, cookies, candies
• Mitts, hat, scarf
• Perfume
• Brush, comb
• Bus or subway tokens / phone card
• Gift certificates (McDonald’s, Tim Horton’s, Shoppers Drug Mart, Wal-Mart, Cineplex). Please include the receipt!

One filled shoebox. For inspiration, see others at https://www.facebook.com/TheShoeboxProjectCanada

Important to know:

1. Value: Please keep the value of your shoebox contents to approximately $50. At this time, we will not be able to provide tax receipts for your donations.
2. Packaged Goods Only Please: Please make sure that the gifts are all packaged, sealed and unused!
3. Decoration: You may decorate your shoebox with a pretty holiday or Christmas bow but please do not wrap your shoebox as it must be opened for inspection before it can be distributed.
4. Drop off: You may bring your shoebox to our following drop off locations starting today and until Monday, December 17th:
   • Vancouver: 2305 McLean Drive (Mon to Fri: 8AM to 6PM; Sat: 11AM to 6PM)
   • Downtown: 1088 Richards Street (only available on select evenings and weekends). Please email to confirm drop-off prior to.

For more information:

• The Shoebox Project Website | Vancouver page
• The Shoebox Project Facebook | Twitter
• A great article about The Shoebox Project on the Huffington Post by one of the co-founders, Caroline Mulroney Lapham

Oh, and if you don't have a shoebox, don't worry. Just bring the items by in a bag .. we'll pack them into one or more shoeboxes for you.

Thank you for reading this and for your consideration. And on your next trip to Shopper's Drug Mart or London Drugs, maybe add a few more things to your basket. You'll be bringing a few moments of joy to a woman who may not be anticipating finding this time of year particularly joyful.

Oh ..  one more thing for my friends in PR. If you represent a company who could donate items to a few boxes (not all 100 - even 1/2 a dozen would be great), could you ask them? Small retailers or franchise owners? I'll gladly pick items up. Thanks!

Ebb and Flow

Yesterday, I was struggling with a new posture in my yoga practice.

My instructor came up to me and said, "Sometimes, I like to pretend that I don't have any tension."

Photo Credit: beedieu

Inspired Along the Autism Spectrum - Temple Grandin

Here is my confession ... I watched the Golden Globes. Mainly for Ricky Gervais. A little for the fashion. But I was so happy that I did because I saw possibly the most genuinely joyous moment that Hollywood had ever seen. The hug that Temple Grandin gave Claire Danes when she won for her performance in HBO's biopic "Temple Grandin" was such a real and delighted gesture. Charming and inspiring.

I have been in complete and utter awe of Temple since seeing her at TED last year. Her lifelong mission to educate people about autism is inspiring as is her work in animal behaviour. 

This is her TED talk. Set aside the 18 minutes to watch. Absolutely worth it, I promise.

Inspired by Rejecting Excuses

I saw a lot of "Uh oh, it's Blue Monday" and "No wonder I'm so sad, it's Blue Monday" status updates and tweets today. But not from A.C. Riley (content strategist extraordinaire). She has a great counterpoint to any manufactured drama: brighten someone's day.

Mission accomplished, Charlotte! You brightened mine!